What I Didn’t Know I Wanted

Today I realized how much I want something. I didn’t know how much I wanted it until I knew the answer was “not yet.” The mixed set of emotions I feel is staggering. Extreme joy knowing I’m ready for what’s to come, and that God knows I need more time than I think I do to prepare. And yet, there is a twinge of sorrow. The future is exciting. It’s not always how you plan it out in your head (actually it’s rarely how you plan it), but knowing God has something so sweet in store for my future refreshes my soul in a way I can barely contain or describe. It’s freeing to know I have an awesome, BIG God in control. The day will come when God says, “ok, now is the time,” and I will rejoice with abandon.